Game of Thrones S4E5: First of His Name

 Posted by on 2014/05/05 at 17:18  Game of Thrones
May 052014

For those of you who watch the Thrones, it’s Monday; let’s talk about last night’s happenings.  The bulk of this post is more general discussion with a few mild spoilers (most of which are things that happened prior to last night).  We’ll do some more specific (and more spoiler-y) thoughts on the episode at the end, but, for propriety’s sake…

Stylish facial hair isn't the only thing both Petyr Baelish and James Franco are into

Stylish facial hair isn’t the only thing both Petyr Baelish and James Franco are into

WARNING: This post contains spoilers that include information regarding up to and including Season 4, Episode 5 of ‘Game of Thrones’.  You’ve been adequately warned.

First, the scattered Stark children were all going to Castle Black so that their half-brother could figure out how to keep them safe.  Unfortunately, Brienne is a few episodes behind in her deduction of Sansa’s future whereabouts, as Littlefinger and The Hound have both decided that getting their respective captive Stark girls to their aunt in the Vale is a better idea.  (Given Mayor Carcetti’s Lord Baelish’s description of the Vale’s defenses, it is).  Bran, presented the opportunity to meet up with Jon Snow (who knows nothing), is convinced that his future lies beyond The Wall.

My takeaway?

Game of (Mobile) Phones

How much different would Westeros be if they had mobile phones? Continue reading »

In Defense of Selling Out

 Posted by on 2014/05/01 at 13:40  Baseball, Sports
May 012014

Wow, I spend a disproportionate number of my Sports posts defending unpopular opinions.  It appears that a forum read by a whole half-dozen people really ignites the fire within my natural contrarian.

We’re back at it this week, because I have beef with my Yankees fan brothers and sisters.  I know grown men who felt a compulsion to buy a ticket to boo a 31-year old who decided that he would prefer to have an additional $65 million, as opposed to an absence of $65 million.  Fine, it’s New York; we boo everyone other than Santa Claus, so this scene was fairly predictable:

Cool.  I mean, the big sign that read “TRAITOR” felt a bit melodramatic, but, cool.  Then, the artists formerly known as Section 39 kind of took things off the rails.  A group of Yankees fans failed to see the irony in them showering a player who left a team to make more money with chants of “You sold out!”.

I wish Cano had some kind of forum to reply with, “Didn’t ya’ll just give $153 million to JACOBY ELLSBURY?!” Continue reading »

Game of Thrones S4E4: Oathkeepber

 Posted by on 2014/04/30 at 20:46  Game of Thrones
Apr 302014

Much like last week, I find myself struggling to derive much to write about an episode of ‘Game of Thrones’ that does a lot of teeing-up and not much driving.  Last week turned into a 1,300 word post, so we’ll see where this goes.  Formalities first:

WARNING: This post contains spoilers that include information regarding up to and including Season 4, Episode 4 of ‘Game of Thrones’.  You’ve been adequately warned.

Have the stories gotten that much more fragmented than previous seasons of the show?  This week, we heard nothing from the presumably still brooding / human torching people Stannis, Ramsay (mercifully), Smooth Bisexual Prince Oberyn, nor everyone’s favorite buddy cop show, ‘Arya & The Hound’.  Perhaps I’m biased, Arya being my favorite character, but it seems that the landscape has expanded beyond that which can be covered in a single hour.  I’d argue, as I do most weeks, that some scenes were throwaways that presented us little to no new information – Mayor Carcetti Littlefinger’s chat with Sansa was largely pointless. Continue reading »

Apr 242014

Last night, Yankees pitcher Michael Pineda was ejected in the 2nd inning of a game against the Boston Red Sox for having some schmutz (technical term) on his neck.  Post-game comments from the Sox’ manager and players indicated that Pineda’s transgression was not what he did, but how he did it.  This may be confusing to the more casual fans among us.  Is neck-schmutzing illegal or isn’t it?  Are you using double negatives to confuse me?  What the hell?!

The umps are not checking Michael Pineda's pulse

The umps are not checking Michael Pineda’s pulse

Breathe.  Cheating in baseball is a complex and nuanced issue.  I’m here to help walk you through the ins and outs of “getting an edge”, “gamesmanship”, or any other euphemism you can think up for cheating on the mound. Continue reading »

Game of Thrones S4E3: Breaker of Chains

 Posted by on 2014/04/21 at 16:15  Game of Thrones
Apr 212014

It’s Monday, so, dorks rejoice!  It’s time to talk some ‘Game of Thrones’.

WARNING: This post contains spoilers that include information regarding up to and including Season 4, Episode 3 of ‘Game of Thrones’.  You’ve been adequately warned.

For reasons I don’t understand, we begin this week where we left off last Sunday, with Cersei yelling for the royal goons to detain Tyrion.  I mean, Tyrion clearly planned on his sociopath nephew king singling him out for humiliation in a manner that put him in close contact with the aforementioned sociopath nephew king’s pimp cup.  Also, his unwilling child bride fleeing the scene of a gruesome murder is clearly damning evidence against television’s favorite little person.

The mutual animosity between siblings Cersei and Tyrion is well-documented.  I’m curious if Cersei would’ve been as quick to blame her brother had he not been in such close proximity to the crime.  Still, I can’t blame the other onlookers for not questioning the Queen Regent’s dodgy police work; speaking contrary to Lannisters in King’s Landing has not, historically, been a very good life choice. Continue reading »

After the Season There’s the After-Season

 Posted by on 2014/04/17 at 11:33  Basketball, Sports
Apr 172014

Now, our journey truly begins.  There is much ahead of us.  The nights will be long, often bleeding into day.  Well, they’ll bleed into about 1:30 – 2AM the next day; the West Coast games typically don’t end much later than that.  That’s right, kids, the NBA Playoffs are here.

Begins?!  Dave, are you high?  They just played an 82-game season!

Yes, maybe, and I understand that.  Look, #RealTalk: the NBA regular season is like excessive foreplay.  It’s exciting when it starts, it has its lulls and thrills, but by the end, everybody recognizes that it’s past time to get it on.

It is, indeed, past time.

Like I said, Dave, you just got 82 games.  What makes the Playoffs so special?

So glad you asked, and the timeliness of you asking me why this night is different from all other nights is not lost on me.  Here’s why I’m amped to stop dozing off during halftime of the late games and double or triple down on my already high NBA consumption: Continue reading »

Game of Thrones S4E2: The Lion & The Rose

 Posted by on 2014/04/14 at 15:58  Game of Thrones
Apr 142014

Since ya’ll have been thoroughly unhelpful finding me a Monday topic that isn’t “anal” (don’t ask), I’m just going to talk about the previous night’s episode of ‘Game of Thrones’ until I get a better idea.

“Really, Dave?  Why ‘Game of Thrones’?”

Yet another thing in Brookstone nobody will buy

Yet another thing at Brookstone nobody will buy

Because ‘Game of Thrones’ is awesome.  If you had told 13-year old Dave that there would be a wildly popular show about the dragons / knights / black magic that he was deemed a dork for reading about, and that the show would feature tons of bare breasts, 13-year old Dave would have built a time machine so he wouldn’t have to wait over a decade to see it.  So basically, if I want to be successful before my 30’s, I have to build a time machine, go back in time, tell 13-year old Dave about ‘Game of Thrones’, and then tell him that he needs to build a time machine to go see it, as I’m sitting in a perfectly good time machine.  Wow, I’m even a dick to my past-self.

A type of dick I will not be, however, is the guy who throws out spoilers without warning.  In that spirit:

WARNING: The rest of this post contains spoilers that include information regarding up to and including Season 4, Episode 2 of ‘Game of Thrones’.  You’ve been adequately warned.

This is a good week to start talking GoT, because there were only (yes, only) four real things going on.  Let’s go from least to most interesting. Continue reading »

In Defense of A-Rod

 Posted by on 2014/04/10 at 13:20  Baseball, Sports
Apr 102014

Note: I see my pageview stats, which made me a little bit surprised that I received more than a couple comments about there being a lack of posts over the past few weeks.  Apparently, the three of you who do read this blog feel strongly enough about having reading material to kill the tail end of your Mondays and/or Thursdays to ask why I’m not providing said reading material.  Fair enough.  I’m back in the saddle.

Photo: NYDN / Getty Requires no further comment from me.

Photo: NYDN / Getty
Requires no further comment from me

That said, be careful what you wish for.  A lot of you are about to disagree strongly with today’s post.  As baseball season begins, I’m going to tie up my one loose end from last year.  After this, we’ll get back to more current (and, hopefully, on-field) stuff.  However, I found the hysteria surrounding Alex Rodriguez’s performance enhancing drug suspension strange, and, in many ways, troubling.  Here is my defense of A-Rod.  It is the longest piece I have ever written for this site. Continue reading »

Scattered Thoughts on the NBA Stretch Run

 Posted by on 2014/03/20 at 09:52  Basketball, Sports
Mar 202014

I decided that the gym iPod mix song posts were weak, so I’m putting the kibosh on them.  My attempt to solicit a new Tuesday topic via Facebook left me mostly with stuff that you don’t want in your browser history.  If you think there’s something I’d be good at riffing on weekly, drop a line in the Comments section below, or hit me up on Twitter with the hashtag #TuesdayTopic (so I know what the hell you’re talking about).

I know my first few sports posts have each centered around one main topic, but here’s the deal: there’s nothing I have a lot to say about this week.  It’s too early to talk baseball just yet; that will likely happen next week.  The NCAA Tournament starts today (Go Cuse!), but I already spent last week explaining how it’s an inferior product to the NBA game.  I don’t talk football in March, because that’s stupid.  Soccer was tempting, but I remembered who my readership is.  Hockey is cool, but those three words sum up my opinions on the sport pretty well.  So, what ya’ll get is my thoughts as we enter the last month of the NBA season.

Let’s start at the top (of the standings). Continue reading »

Mar 132014

There are plenty of comments that people habitually throw out there which are completely devoid of any basis in reality.  “Twinkies can last for at least a couple decades.”  “All toilets in Australia drain clockwise.”  “‘The Big Bang Theory’ is funny.”  “Avatar was a good movie.”

No, no, hell no, and fuck no.  That said, Kaley Cuoco, how you doin’?

Around this time of year, there is always a large group of people who confidently try to promulgate a myth so outrageous, would rate it “Pants On Fire”.

I have no idea what’s rating system is.

With Selection Sunday looming, and the NCAA Men’s College Basketball Tournament a week away, we’re nearing the part of the calendar where you will probably hear someone say something to the effect of, “Man, the college basketball game is better than the pros!”

If this were any more false, Bill Clinton would say it under oath, and then act confused about the definition of the word “game”. Continue reading »